Equalizer 2000

So it seems like Al Gore’s predictions of the future are going to right on and Cirio H. Santiago has given us a glimpse of it.  Global warming and nuclear terrorism has turned the world in to barren wasteland.  Oil and water are scarce, and everyday brings new battle with your enemies.  But things aren’t all bad.  Practically everyone drives a convertible because the world is a desert.  And they are not those weenie convertibles like the Sunbird or Sebring, these are self-made out of huge Oldsmobile’s and Buick’s!  For everyone who just can’t decide what to wear in the morning, fashion has gotten way more simplified!  The most powerful faction, known as The Ownership, control the main supply of oil and are fond of wearing black leather, football pads and helmets. Their main resistance is The Rebels, who control the main supply of water. The Rebels are fans of camouflage and marijuana, as noted by the pot leafs on their berets. If neither of those  appeal to you, there is still the Mountain People, who are basically Indians/Mexicans who wear jeans or sweatpants and still fight with spears and bows.

As the movie begins we get a glimpse of our main hero Slade knee deep in bullets and explosions.  Slade is played by Richard Norton (China O’Brien and other Cynthia Rothrock films). During a battle with the Rebels, Slade is captured and one of his Ownership brethren, Lawton, reports back that he has betrayed them and joined the Rebels. While trying to escape capture our hero meets up with Karen, played by Corinne Wahl (Penthouse Pet of the Month of 2 different occasions). Karen is on the run from some vigilantes she tried to screw over.  You’ll recognize the main vigilante as Robert Patrick (Terminator 2: Judgment Day, The Marine, From Dusk Till Dawn 2: Texas Blood Money) who plays Deke.  Karen takes an injured Slade back to a Rebel camp. He knows he must seek revenge against those who have betrayed him, but how? The Ownership has superior manpower and firepower… but the Rebel’s have been working on a secret weapon… you guessed it, the Equalizer 2000!

The Equalizer 2000 is essentially an M-16 with a few grenade launchers attached for good measure. As The Ownership attacks the Rebel camp Slade uses the E2K to do some major damage blowing up their convertibles.  They soon realize they are going to need more than football equipment to battle the Rebels.  Slade now has a weapon that can help him get revenge. The only problem is he can’t seem to hold on to the E2K to save his life! While helping the Rebels escape into the hills Slade and Karen are captured by Deke who has now joined the Ownership. The E2K is now in the hands of The Ownership and Lawton.  Fearing that they won’t last the winter without oil from The Ownership, the Rebels pull everyone together for one last strike. Will Slade help the Rebels, get revenge and retrieve the E2K?  I guess you’ll have to watch and find out!

For your typical post-apocalyptic movie I thought this was a pretty decent.  It started out in the heat of battle which is good for any action flick.  There were lots of explosions and a few good chase scenes.  The E2K was exactly what I would have wanted a weapon to look like when I was a kid in the 80’s.  The weapon is a good focus of as opposed to the central character.  If you were a fan of Airwolf you’ll love the music in this movie. Growing up I watched a lot of low budget action movies like this, and it certainly wasn’t my first with Richard Norton in it. I was pleasantly surprised to see that this was Robert Patrick’s first major movie. He did a great job and really reminded me of Emilio Estevez as Billy the Kid in Young Guns I and II. This is one I would definitely recommend to any fan of 80’s action films.


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