Ninja III: The Domination

Ninja III - The DominationNinjas are the closest things to comic book super heroes that we have ever seen in the history of the world. They can evaporate into thin air, they can destroy entire villages with their bare hands, and they can walk on water. I’ve learned quite a few things from watching Ninja III: The Domination, and one of those things I’ve learned is that a killer ninja can transfer his soul through his sword to another person. One other thing I’ve learned is when those crazy ninja spirits try to take over your body, you might be able to hold them off for a little by practicing aerobics while putting on crappy 80’s pop music that was hastily written minutes before recording – but that’s only because those crazy ninja spirits are just messing with your head. You can never resist crazy ninja spirits.

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Mike Delano (Steve Rally), a detective for the LAPD, refuses to let the Yakuza take over the west coast.  While eating in a sushi restaurant, Mike and his partner witness the murder of the owner and his daughter when they won’t pay protection money to a couple Japanese gangsters.  Mike’s partner gets killed during the investigation, and he gets informally teamed up with Akashi (John Nishio), a Tokyo cop to out for vengeance for slain family members who were killed in the restaurant.  Akashi is used to dealing with the Yakuza in Japan, and shows Mike that he had been dealing with them in the wrong way.  While the Yakuza are not afraid of death, they do respect the method of death, so Akashi quickly dispatches one of the  thugs and marks him with the phoenix to send a message.  Now they must battle the gang to earn their respect.  Will the Yakuza kill of Mike and Akashi, or will Mike and Akashi collect all of the limbs of the gang to earn the respect they deserve – and stop them from taking over the whole west coast?  Did we mention that this was directed by Ulli Lommel, the same guy that directed one of our least favorite movies “Cocaine Cowboys“?  This should be interesting…

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Earthquakes have broken-out all over Japan and the carnage is devastating! But the volcano has been dormant for 2000 years so there must be another explanation right? Princess Dragon Mom has returned to take over the earth and destroy the human race. She is sending her most deadly mutants to destroy Professor Liu and the science lab that has the technology to defeat her. But there is only one person who can defeat her now and save the earth from total destruction… INFRAMAN!

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Ninja Wars

Ninja Wars Title

Ninja Wars (aka Iga ninpocho) is an odd movie.  It’s not odd in the fact that it’s a ninja movie, it’s odd in the fact that despite being superficially a ninja movie, it’s really not a ninja movie at all.  Despite the title, Ninja Wars is in fact a love story.  While their may be some wars, bloody fight scenes, and a few ninjas hopping around, it’s almost not even a martial arts movie… That is, if you watch the subtitled version.

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