Tag Archive for 'kung-fu'

Black Belt Jones

Rating: 3

Poppa Byrd is one tough old dude (played by one of the best voice-over actors ever, Scatman Crothers).  He runs the baddest dojo in the whole city.  Unfortunately, Poppa Byrd is a gambler, see.  He owes Pinky and his some money, and they’re the wrong people to owe some money to.  Pinky is pissed, and he’s coming to collect.  When they get there, they offer to take Byrd’s dojo in exchange for his debts, but when he doesn’t see eye to eye, he takes a double neck punch straight into heaven.  Wrong move, brotha! See, Byrd has a star pupil who just happens to be be one of the baddest mutha’s (shut yo mouth!) in town… and his name is Black Belt Jones!

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Wheels on Meals

Rating: 4

Ever since I saw Jackie Chan’s first American hit Rumble in the Bronx I have been a huge fan. I’ve seen almost every one of his movie that has come out in theaters since then. But it wasn’t until recently that I found out that some of his earlier work which wasn’t released in the U.S. was some of his best. Included in that is the /comedy Wheels on Meals. A lot of Jackie’s work before he was a major Hollywood star was done with 2 of his best friends. You may remember a TV show in the late 1990s called Martial Law. This show starred Sammo Hung as a kung-fu working in L.A. Jackie’s other friend, Yuen Biao , you probably remember from… well nothing because he never made it to American cinema which is a shame. Many people regard Yuen as the most talented of the 3. They all attended the same Chinese Opera school together and have been making films ever since.

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The Devil’s Sword

Rating: 4

Take one part Excalibur, throw in some Krull, a few scenes of Caligola, a touch of Dawn of the Dead, the choreography of Kung Fu Hustle, about 30 seconds of The Blue Lagoon, and you have our movie of the week… Golok setan, aka The Devil’s Sword! Director Ratno Timoer takes us for a wild ride in this chopsocky from 1984, filled with , kung-fu masters, blood, , violence and men dressed like alligators.  The best part is our old friend Barry Prima from Ferocious Female Freedom Fighters is back to kick some more ass!

The Devil’s Sword follows a quest to find an ancient sword that was forged from a mysterious metallic substance that fell to earth in the form of a meteorite.  An old man who finds the meteorite creates the Devil’s Sword, and he hides it after it burns down his hut.  Whoever wields the sword holds the greatest power imaginable in his hands.  Banujaga is sent by the Alligator Queen to steal the fiance of a local village’s princess to keep as her own subject.  During the raid on the village Mandala - a one time colleague of Banujaga - sees the scuffle and helps defend the village, and ends up helping the princess recover her husband to be.  Mandala recovers the Devil’s Sword, but will it ultimately be enough to defeat the Alligator Queen and Banujaga?

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Duel to the Death

Rating: 2.5

I first heard about Xian si jue (aka Duel to the Death) when I was watching a video montage of battles. Seeing the over the top supernatural battles on that video - I knew I had to find this movie and watch the whole thing. The story is quite simple. You have two warriors - one from , Ching Wan a master of some Shaolin style, and Kada Hashimot a from . For centuries and would have their best warriors fight in a “ to the Death” every ten years. Ching Wan begins to have second thoughts about the . While he’s contemplating going through with the battle, sends in a ninja regiment to steal Chinese secrets and to throw the battle. In the end Ching and Kada in a literarly earth shattering battle.

In the beginning you start off with a ninja assault on a Chinese temple. Ching Wan anxious to test his skill literarly flies out to fend of the . The battles get crazier after this initial battle, only to climax with the of the decade. All of the battles in this movie are fairly over the top, but the story gets slow and a little confusing as the movie progresses. Ching and Kada meet in preparation for the and then they part ways for a bit. Why? I’m not sure because I didn’t pay attention. The only times I actually paid attention to was when steel was clashing with steel. This movie is worth watching for the intense battles, but the story behind it… yeah, not so much. I’ve watched this movie a few times and every time I tell myself that I’m going to pay attention to this whole movie, but the story loses me every time.

This movie gets fairly cheesy and boring at points, but you can’t beat giant stripper , graphic dismemberments, and people exploding. I would recommend this movie for the fights, but if the story starts to slow down, you should just fast forward to the next fight scene.

For a clip of a battle with a giant stripper ninja, check below the break…

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Internal Bleeding - We specialize in and review B-movies, Horror, Exploitation, Grindhouse, Bizarre, Zombie and 80's teen schlock. Individual and Dueling reviews, every week.

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