Tag Archive for 'nazi'

Best and Worst of 2008 - a Review of Reviews in Review.

reviewIt’s the last day of the year 2008, and this marks the first year that we’ve been reviewing films.  Well, it hasn’t been a full year - we started this current incarnation of the website on March 8th, 2008 with our first review of ’s “The Stuff” (note to ourselves - review more films!).  Anyhow, since it’s the end of the year, we figured if you really wanted to you could browse around the site and look at all the stuff we’ve covered, but if you’re the lazy type like us, this condensed view of some of our highlights and lowlights might be right up your alley.  In this post you’ll find some clips and summary of our highest rated films and lowest.  So… without further adieu, let’s get on with the show:

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Shock Waves

Rating: 1.5

A diving trip gone wrong puts a vacationing group into a sticky situation with what should be the coolest film villain of all time… zombies.  Unfortunately, this one ends up being all wet (very punny!).  John Carradine plays the Captain of a shoddy diving boat taking tourists off on a discount trip.  After having a few engine problems finally worked out, they set sail back on course.  The only problem is they don’t really know where they are, so finding that course could prove to be a little difficult…  All they end up finding are Shock Waves!

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War of the Dead

Rating: 0.5

Nazi zombies seek on the soldiers that killed them in World War II. When WWII veterans start dropping dead from grenade attacks, special agent Kelly Conda hunts down the Nazi zombies that are the linked to these mysterious deaths. Camille Djokoto (Special Agent Kelly Conda) stars in “” directed by Sean Cisterna.

There is not much I can really say about this movie but it was very bad. The acting was horrible and it looked like it was filmed with a camcorder. This movie had the film quality of a porno movie. I was very disappointed when I got to the ending credits and there were no sex scenes at all. I think the only thing that could have redeemed this movie is if were actually a porno.

This movie starts out with a crappy fight scene between the heroine and a female vampire. Once again, the film quality is cheesy and the fight sequence looks very choppy and unrealistic with horrible choreography. And, the vampire chick had the potential to look hot, but the wardrobe designer failed miserably as she was dressed in a lame white T shirt and formless black pants. Where are the fishnets and spandex? Needles to say, Kelly gets the upper hand and kicks the vampire into a fountain which she freshly blessed and turned into holy water. Apparently this scene is used to establish the credibility of Kelly Conda as a warrior against the undead because the movie makes a hard left turn and focuses on Nazi zombies.

The story behind the Nazi zombies is that they are seeking for their deaths in WWII. They spend their time hunting down the American soldiers, who must be in their 80s and 90s by now, who the zombies blame for their untimely deaths. These guys do not stand a fighting chance against the zombies, who, by the way, look remarkably well for being 80 or 90 year old corpses themselves. They find their first victim trying to solicit sex from a woman in a diner. He is forced to eat a grenade and ends up splattered all over the diner wall, along with the woman he was hitting on and other employees and patrons. From here on the zombies seek out the other veterans and then they blow them up using the same exploding grenade method. That is until Kelly Conda and her lame cop sidekick show up on the scene and try to stop the madness.

This movie is not the greatest. In fact, this movie is quite awful. The acting is pretty bad and I couldn’t help thinking that Camille Djokoto fell pretty flat as a lead actress. That is, until the surprise twist ending which wasn’t really surprising or much of a twist. The movie is somewhat silly but I would recommend utilizing the time it would take to watch this movie to do anything else. Save yourself, do not watch this movie.

Check below the break for some images from “

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2020 Texas Gladiators

Rating: 2.5

2020 Texas Gladiators Title

For this review, I’m going to be taking a look at another piece of fine Italian Cinema called “Anno 2020 - I gladiatori del futuro” aka 2020 Texas Gladiators. Gladiators is directed by Joe D’Amato (who also directed a previous movie of the week, Endgame) and stars Al Cliver (Endgame) Daniel Stephen (he was in an episode of The Chapelle Show) and Donald O’Brien (Zombi Holocaust aka Doctor Butcher M.D.) as “Black One”

The movie starts out pretty abruptly with this… After the apocalypse, a 5 man band of badass dudes form the Rangers. While on a mission to rescue some humans from a mutant attack, One of the rangers, Catch Dog, gets kicked out of the group by their leader Nisus for raping a woman they rescued named Miada. Catch Dog leaves to join forces with a group. Nisus, on the other hand, starts a family with Maida and they settle down in a small village where he works at the power plant on a experimental form of energy. The village tries to start a new civilization, but have to fend off attacks from a gang led by “Black one”. When the gang invades, Nisus’s wife gets raped again, and he dies trying to save her. The remaining rangers are on the case, and Catch Dog is trying to stop them from saving the town. Can you feel the suspense?

Somehow, the rangers all have an internal tracking device, because they always know where to find each other, even after being seperated for an unexplained amout of time. When rangers “Jab” and “Halakron” get put to work in the mines, “Red Wolfe” knows where they are with no problems. After they get free, it’s time to kick ass.

This movie has taught me a few things. For example, after the atomic war, people play defender and russian roulette for fun (one of my favorite quotes from the movie is “what’s the game?” “loser blows his head all over the wall, we call it roulette”), and if you cause too much damage, and get arrested, you get put to work in radioactive salt mines. Note to future self: practice on your defender, and learn how to use a pickaxe. Also, work on abs.

There’s a good amount of in this movie, unlike the other D’Amato movie I’ve seen “Endgame”, so the story moves along pretty well, even if it doesn’t make a lot of sense most of the time. The sets and most of the vehicles from this movie were recycled in Endgame, but they seem to work a little better in this one. 2020 Texas Gladiators also was made first, so it makes sense that the recycled material looks better here. As for the vehicles, The ranger mobile (along with all the other 4 wheeled vehicles in the movies) are totally laughable. There is a truck that looks like a black UPS truck for chrissakes. The acting, on the other hand, is just over the top enough, but the main villian “Black One” really pours it on thick with the schtick - right down to his maniacal laughter. Also, the whole native american aspect that comes up late in the film is a nice touch.

While this is an movie, it also has some elements of . There are like soldiers that hold sheilds that are cutout that are impervious to weapon fire, and a laser rifle with no visible shots, just a phaser sound effect. Also, while I’m assuming this is supposed to be set in the year 2020, there’s not real indication from anywhere, except the title of the movie.

After watching this movie, I can’t tell what it has to do with Texas, Gladiators, or the year 2020. Nevertheless, it’s a pretty decent movie, even if you don’t know what the hell is going on 75% of the time.

Check below the break for how gambling is held in the future, and a look at one of those cut out shields I was talking about.

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Internal Bleeding - We specialize in and review B-movies, Horror, Exploitation, Grindhouse, Bizarre, Zombie and 80's teen schlock. Individual and Dueling reviews, every week.

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